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Sometimes people change people

And that happened to me recently.

Nirrimi and her baby daughter, Alba.

Nirrimi Joy Firebrace is her name. Please take some hours of your life to read and embrace her blog, because it's so worth those precious hours.
Her simple, gypsy kind, way of life made me realize the simplest things in life, and how thankfull we have to feel about living freely every second of it. I am wasting my time, idealizing a life that I probably will never have, and this girl opened my eyes, made me feel in the bottom of my heart what am I really designed for.

I believe that God has a plan for every one of us. Even if you don't believe in God, there is always something waiting for us, we just have to work had throughout our lifes to get it.

To Nirrimi, everything is possible. She is only nineteen. Shes a photographer of fashion and editorial, but in her personal side, she photographs life and documents everything. It's her passion, she only does the fashion side of it so she can provide her supplies to live. She lives with her teen love, they are the happier young couple alive and recently they just had a child. They concieved Alba consciently, it was not an accident. And now, Nirrimi says she is the happiest she has ever been, and blessed that she gets to do what she loves with the love of her life by her side, and their baby daughter.

Motherhood to me was always something I've put aside. Because I want to enjoy my life to the fullest first, and even decided not to be a parent at all. For some that might sound evil, I know, but I'd rather not be a parent knowing I wouldn't want that kind of life to me, ever. After reading her blog, that doesn't make sense to me anymore. Why not sharing? Whether share it with my boyfriend, or a friend, or family. Or a child. 

The point is... I should pursuit my happiness, find what really makes me happy and stop worrying what people say or think about me, because that is what's keeping me from reaching a lot of goals I set earlier this year.

I am unemployed. I'm furstrated that I can't find a job and no one and nowhere will answer me. So my next goal is that if I don't find anything I really love doing here in Lisbon, I will just have to leave to somewhere that makes me happy. That is what I keep filling my mind with. I'm done holding back my prospects in life and dreams. I am 24 and I can't wait to live the way I want to. 
I must confess I am scared. I'm petrified because I am not sure of anything right now, not in a week, not in a year, and that is scary. I don't like the anxiety, I don't like to feel this way, miserable all the time, knowing that everyday is just another wasted day.

It was just a random thought that I wanted to share. Who knows it might change the way someone sees things in life, like Nirrimi's words did with me. Held you head high. Find confidence and strengh within yourself. That's it.

My escape of my boring, wasted life, is my Tumblr, literally. Everything that inspires me, every detail, image, color that I re-post there is what makes me dream. It's my mood-board, my get-away. Feel free to visit: 

(All of the pictures posted here (besides the first one) are in my Tumblr)

I'm sorry for the extention of this post. Lately I haven't been this personal, but I had to share this because I feel that it was an important change, in the bottom of my heart.
I love my followers, thank you the support 

2 comentários:

  1. Descobri o blog dela há uns meses, e confesso que teve o mesmo efeito em mim. Lembro-me de ter pensado, como era possível alguém querer ser mãe tão jovem, de se ter privar de fazer tantas coisas, que normalmente é exigido quando se cria uma criança... Mas a realidade é que ela fez exactamente o contrário. Nada a impediu de seguir o caminho dela, e a felicidade é mais do que evidente nas fotografias. Tal como tu, também estou desempregada, sem saber o que o futuro me reserva e isso assusta-me, muito. Espero que tudo melhore eventualmente, para mim e que para ti também. :)

    (e obrigada por me teres dado a conhecer o novo álbum da Ellie. Estou coladíssima nele!)

    1. O teu comentário deixou-me a sorrir imenso! Não só porque partilhas da mesma opinião, como também te encontras na mesma situação que eu, tanto que percebo o que sentiste ao passar tempo a ver o blog da Nirrimi e a ter uma lufada de ar fresco. Eventualmente tudo se resolve. É assustador mas não é o fim do mundo. Mega sorte para ti também!

      A Ellie é maravilhosa, estou completamente viciada desde há uns 2 dias para cá no album. É fantástico!


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